Money is one of the most fought about, obsessed and stressed over thing in many people’s lives. Most of the time, your feelings about money come from your past experiences, a significant adult’s point of view on money, and what financial struggles you had growing up.
When money and finances become the main player in your conversations and it’s in a negative way, it’s time to make a change. Seeing money in a positive light will decrease stress, create security, and likely improve your relationship with those involved in financial struggles. I’ve dealt with clients who divorced solely based on financial wars.
Upfront and most important is understanding where your financial insecurity or obsession comes from. Often as children, we hear our parents arguing over money, being flush with cash and spending frivolously, or first-hand experience hardships due to lack of money.
The story we tell ourselves at this young age, carries, often subconsciously, into our adult years. The belief one has over money is what drives them to feel secure or stressed. What story are you telling yourself about money? Is it beneficial or the enemy? Where did this story originate? Knowing your story and fully understanding its effect on you is the place to start.
Next, how do you want to view money? Visualization is highly effective. When you visualize your financial accomplishments, your stress levels go down but also, you’re instilling a new positive money mindset. Some ways to do this are visualizing exactly how much money is in your bank account and watching it grow, how great it feels to not have any debt, and the cash you have left over each month after your bills are paid. What do you want to do with your extra money?
Another great way to instil those feel-good money-sense mindsets is to save. Write out what your daily, weekly, and monthly expenditures are. Where can you cut spending that’s realistic? This may be daily coffees, weekly eating out, unnecessary online purchases, and entertainment expenditures. You can save money by preparing meals at home, double thinking purchases (do you really need another appliance you’ll never use?), and looking for free entertainment events in your city.
Track your spending. Keeping an eye on your bank account each week is key. You’ll see where you’re spending the most and devise a plan to reduce that. Being on top of your spending creates a sense of control and there are no surprises when it’s time to pay off your credit card.
Credit cards can be used as weapons or responsibly. How many do you have? I have a client who has five cards. She fills one up, uses the next, pays off the third, then starts to fill that one. Borrows from the fourth because her second one is now maxed. You can imagine how stressful and out of control that feels. Keeping one is ideal and a second for back up as needed.
Feeling financially secure is work if your background is set up with the belief that money brings negativity. It doesn’t have to be this way. Practice keeping a positive money mindset and watch your bank account, whether real or visualized, grow.
—Sara Aloimonos is a columnist, life coach and functional nutritionist in Yellowknife.