I failed my mid-term. I have never been any good at tests but this was the first time I’ve ever failed something that I was trying to succeed in. The big F in red pen was a shock and embarrassment. I thought I would have at least skimmed by with a passing grade but nope. I went home that day and told my family that I had failed and their reaction was worry. Worry that I wasn’t going to make it through.
Their worry made me realize that my family is counting on me, rooting for me to succeed. They believe in me. They have an invested interest in my dreams coming true. They hope that my dreams coming true will provide us for a better future. My dream of becoming a lawyer is not only my dream alone anymore, it is my families too. This dream is not far away, either. It is just within reach and I have loved ones counting on me to not give up or fail. We all need this. We all need support from our loves ones to cheer us on. If we don’t have this, then we must be this for someone else.
In taking a good hard look at failure I see that it has taught me not to give in just because I might be temporarily discouraged. If anything, failure has taught me to try harder, when many might just find it easier give up.
The class that I failed was the class that I found dry and boring. It was about policy and legislation and since I already worked in government I felt that I had a solid understanding of the legislative process and I didn’t think I really had to do much in the way of studying for the exam. Basically, I thought it was a cinch. I got too cheeky and learned a real lesson in never underestimating a law school exam because during the exam I panicked when I saw how complex the questions were.
Since coming to grips with my recent failure, I will get back on the horse of second chances and take the time to learn the content of the course much more than I would if I had just skimmed by on the test and got a passing grade. The way I see it now, if I didn’t fail I wouldn’t have appreciated or had a grasp on what I was learning. So, in a way, failing was a gift because I am putting in much more effort to learn the material and study for my final exam so that I can be confident in myself.
As in life, we all fall down sometimes but must get back up and keep trying. The more we get back up and dust ourselves off, the stronger and wiser we become. Failure is not the be all end all, it’s what you do with it and what you learn from it that matters.